You have to laugh, you have to smile–our lives can be ridiculous, crazy at times.
So here’s something that only teachers “get”:
I carry a permanent marker with me, at all times.
Teacher Humor
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Tag Archives: humor
January 2, 2019: Quote of the Day
“Good teaching is 1/4 preparation and 3/4 theatre.”
–Gail Goodwin
Things I never knew . . .
Installment #2:
Five things I never knew . . . until I became a teacher:
- how long I could be sick–that first year I was sick for three months straight
- how sick I could be, and still go to work–sick days are few the first year, not to mention sick days are difficult to take anyway as a teacher
- how worthless all those immune booster drinks and powders are–they are no match for school germs
- how much Kleenex are consumed/can be consumed in a single day–between my sick self and my sick students, I can go through several boxes in a single day, it’s ridiculous
- how many kids come to school sick–it’s a lot, and often
Things I never knew . . .
There are many things I have learned as a teacher–let this be the beginning of many wonderful posts on the things I never knew . . . until I became a teacher.
Five things I never knew . . . until I became a teacher:
- how long I can go without a bathroom break–it’s pretty long
- how much caffeine I can consume–it’s a lot
- how much noise I can block out–it’s insane
- how much I love mystery meat–it’s kinda gross to admit it, but sack lunches with their mystery meat sandwiches are my favorite 🤤
- how much I hate breakfast for lunch–it’s terrible, syrup and 1000s of children should be outlawed
Ms. Camacho
My name is Ms. Camacho.
Not Miss. Not Mrs. Not Mr.
Ms. Camacho
Camacho, rhymes with Macho–as in “macho, macho, man.”
Ms. Camacho
In the classroom my students have transformed my name into:
- Mrs. Camacho
- Miss Camacho
- Mr. Camacho
- Mrs. CaNACHO — and I reply “nacho, I don’t have any nachos!”
- Miss Nacho — see previous
- Miss Poncho — happened only once and I had no response other than over-the-top laughter
- Miss Macho — and I reply by flexing and saying “Macho” repeatedly like a fool
- Mr. Macho — see previous but add a deeper voice and even more exaggerated flexing
It’s a fun world in teaching, especially in primary, your name can take on a number of additions, substitutions, and alterations. 😝
Please stop . . .
There are moments in the classroom where you have to say the darndest things. In a classroom, it’s not just the kids–teachers say the darndest things.
Here’s a quick list of things that come immediately to mind, things that I have literally asked my kids to stop doing:
- Please stop yelling.
- Please stop screaming.
- Please stop talking.
- Please stop drawing there . . . or there . . . or there.
- Please stop drawing on that . . . or that . . . or this.
- Please stop eating that (re: pencil, paper, paper clip, marker, colored pencil, etc.).
- Please stop sucking on that (re: almost always a marker–what’s in markers?!).
- Please stop shouting.
- Please stop jumping.
- Please stop sleeping.
- Please stop picking at that.
- Please stop scratching yourself.
- Please stop putting your hands in your pants–and please go wash your hands.
- Please stop picking your nose–and please go wash your hands.
- Please stop picking at your teeth–and please go wash your hands.
- Please stop kicking.
- Please stop moving.
- Please stop writing.
- Please stop erasing.
- Please stop playing with her hair, with his hair, with your hair.
- Please stop eating your hair.
- Please stop chewing on that . . . or that . . . or this.
It amazes me how much can be destroyed, chewed, eaten, scratched, said on any given day. It’s always an adventure in teaching.
